Meet Carly. She thinks a lot of herself. In fact, she probably assumes this email is about her. She never misses an opportunity to check herself in the mirror when she's crying, to see if she's still pretty (she is). Carly DOES NOT leave the house without makeup. Ever. She curls her hair every single day no matter what plans, or lack of plans, she has. She does not allow anyone to post photos that aren't pre-approved by her, but once they are approved she insists that they are posted. She has spent approximately $15,679 on beauty treatments so far ths year and it's not really even Fall yet.
As Courtney was handed the rule pamphlet, she swore she saw the Da Vinci code. Symbols swirled around, English words became foreign and strange. She somehow now knows how to set up a VCR after reading them, but still does not quite understand how to win atMahjong.
Last week she ordered each of them one of those gadgets that shatters your car window in case of a full water immersion. She also ordered a wind up radio. You know, in case the power grid goes down. She changed the air filters in the house last month, and commented that Olive Garden is a heck of a deal if you get a family sized pan with a five dollar take-home add-on. She’s been cracking open a Bud heavy after yoga class lately, and finally decided to try out a MyPillow.
But here she sits, six years after her appointment with WIDK reporting on milk prices, beauty pageants, the occasional car theft, Alderman election scandals, and downtown green space clean up efforts. This stupid little town doesn’t deserve her. She’s meant for greatness, and she despises their perky greetings on the streets....
