he visited Palm Beach for the first time this past summer and now she has transformed herself into a Slim Aarons subject. She is not the beneficiary of multi-generational wealth so this has been a tricky process. She convinced her husband to cash out on their equity line to put in a pool in the backyard. Unfortunately it’s really just a little wading pool so use your imagination. She purchased a pair of white-rimmed Chanel sunglasses on eBay and has started using giant rollers in her hair at night to achieve the perfect hair flip. Her next paycheck is going towards turbans and caftans and she’s begun a nightly cigarette and 3-martini routine. She’s fashioned a poolside cabana out of the cover that came with her Ballard outdoor patio furniture from 7 years ago and she keeps making her friends sit with her by the pool when they come to visit. Even though it’s freezing outside and they stubbornly insist on wearing their ugly jackets. And they are being so judgy about the smoking! All that’s left to do is get a dog, lose 20 pounds and plant some palm trees. Those do fine in Massachusetts as long as they’re in full sun, right??
But tonight Harriett is going to rev Dan’s engine! She started with an immensely painful wax this morning which was also quite demoralizing, as Harriett certainly lived up to her name. Tonight she’ll corner Dan after the kids are in bed.
Meet Dottie.She’s that person you know who is obsessed with the Olympics.She hosts an opening ceremony viewing party each year and commands an intense focus normally reserved for a lottery drawing or a breaking news announcement
Of course she will have a cellophane wrapped gift for each teacher containing a candle, lotion, chocolate covered almonds and a $25 target gift card to be hand-delivered by their children on the first day.Her back windshield will be covered with bubble letters written in shoe polish exclaiming ‘Back to School for Paxton and Claxton!’
