Meet Margaret. Her 7 year old daughter plays rec soccer and Margaret IS NOT HAVING ANY OF THE OTHER TEAM’S SHIT. Do you hear me?? Little McKenna loves to get out on the field and just have fun running around with her friends.
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Barbara claims to support the middle class, but her plan would create a 534% increase in taxes. In 2016 she was seen rolling her eyes at an elderly person at the supermarket.
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Meet Mrs. Claws. You’re much more acquainted with her husband, of course, with his miraculous trip to each child on earth every Christmas. His distribution of that perfect gift that was exactly what was requested - the delight contained in the stockings Christmas morning. Oh, isn’t he exalted!! But what you may not know is that Mrs. Claws is the real power behind the man.
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Heeeeere comes Laura! So, she was on her way to the panhandle area initially. Then somewhere along the way she met up with Marco, who came from Cuba. Whoa boy. He is a charmer and a looker but he’s one of those guys that never lives up to his potential. And he’s a total mooch - trying to join up with any woman he sidles up next to. Oh Laura wasn’t one to seek attention and was coasting along relatively mildly, but then she met up with Marco, and all hell has broken loose. Now, I don’t know exactly what all happened between them out there over the Gulf, but I’ve heard it said it involved thousands in cash, a one-legged stripper, 3 cigars and a PT Cruiser. 🤷♀️ Whatever it was, Laura has LOST HER DAMN MIND. She’s changed her plan and is now headed straight for Louisiana, God help us all. She is completely on the warpath. She will visit many cities along the way, raging and dumping her tears all over anybody in her path. Hell hath no fury, etc. If you see her, take shelter. If you hear that new Taylor Swift song, “Mad Woman” on the wind, you’ll know shit’s about to go down. It’s her current fave.
