Meet Dottie. She’s that person you know who is obsessed with the Olympics. She hosts an opening ceremony viewing party each year and commands an intense focus normally reserved for a lottery drawing or a breaking news announcement. As she evaluates each country’s opening ceremony uniform, she joyfully recounts memorable uniforms from years past such as Japan’s rainbow ponchos from 2000, or Sweden’s 2012 rugby shirts. And who could forget Russia’s 1996 white suits with colorful sleeves?? Naturally nobody else in the room remembers any of these, but they nod along enthusiastically, and she continues to blissfully assume that everybody else is as passionate about the Olympics as she. There is a betting pool about whose uniform will voted the best, with the winner receiving this year’s plushie Olympic mascot (which this year is the Olympic Phryge hat – not particularly sought after but then, none of them have ever been sought after). She discusses Simone Biles’ stats the way your husband analyzes college football recruits. She weeps during the gymnastics floor routines.
