Meet Ashley. She's in a cult. Ashley grew up in a pretty typical family in the suburbs of Tempe, but her mother's controlling ways drove her to the arms of Simone Smith, founder of Cosmic People of the Oracle. She became part of "The Family" and now firmly believes that Simon's dog is the reincarnated soul of an alien who landed on earth 150 years ago, and buried a spaceship in an Arizona desert that contains a potion for everlasting life. Ashley and her 25 family members share 3 old vans painted electric green and venture out to Sams Club in them once a month to purchase supplies. For money, The Cosmic People of the Oracle bottle and sell CBD oil as well as applesauce. Ashley is wife #7 to Simon, 54, who is balding with a man bun and once served as an extra on "Alf" in the 80's. When she is alone, Ashley works through her demons by painting. Her zodiac sign is Zorg, based on Simon's dog's galaxy's star chart.
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.