Meet Margaret. Her 7 year old daughter plays rec soccer and Margaret IS NOT HAVING ANY OF THE OTHER TEAM’S SHIT. Do you hear me?? Little McKenna loves to get out on the field and just have fun running around with her friends.
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Meet Mrs. Claws. You’re much more acquainted with her husband, of course, with his miraculous trip to each child on earth every Christmas. His distribution of that perfect gift that was exactly what was requested - the delight contained in the stockings Christmas morning. Oh, isn’t he exalted!! But what you may not know is that Mrs. Claws is the real power behind the man.
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Meet Ruth- she’s tiny but mighty. She’s intense, and somewhat quiet but may be one of the most intimidating women ever. Ruth grew up in a working class family but was brilliant, and ended up attending Cornell where she met her outgoing, gregarious husband - the first boy she’d ever dated who actually cared that she had a brain.
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Barbara claims to support the middle class, but her plan would create a 534% increase in taxes. In 2016 she was seen rolling her eyes at an elderly person at the supermarket. Barbara claims that her opponent wants to defund the police, but she has not shown up for the Sherrif’s Annual Pancake Breakfast fundraiser for the last three years. You know what else Barbara did? She took campaign money from Osama Bin Laden’s ghost. Last year she voted to pass a bill making it legal to punch toddlers in the face while spinning in a circle on your right foot, chanting “bingo” repeatedly. Can we really afford a senator who associates with terrorist specters, and hates financial success, the elderly, law enforcement and toddlers? Barbara, she wants to ruin America.
