This is Celia. She's the queen of Dublin, GA. I know she has mastered the refined Southern lady vibe but friend, Celia has a bonfire ready to flare up at a moment's notice. She plays tennis but always pre-games with mimosas, and once told Patricia on Team B that she wishes she WOULD serve that first serve at her face and she'll knock her so hard she'll think the ground flew up and hit her. She monograms everything with a matching shade of celadon to create a calming mood in her home, but if her husband pisses her off and walks out of the room, she shoots him a bird so aggressively that her middle finger leads her across the room as if on autopilot. Celia is a really good time on the porch after dinner but after her best 3 stories she gets windy as a sack full of farts. She's delightful in most ways, just don't cross her. She ahs been a season ticket holder to Georgia games for 35 years. GO DAWGS!
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.