This is a group of coworkers all preparing to draw names for Secret Santa at the office. Claudia is the boss and she is the most passive aggressive woman alive. When she disapproves of an employee’s decision she asks “and...how did we come to that conclusion?” She always refers to people as “we” even though she takes full credit for all good ideas. One of these ladies is notorious for putting half the bagels from the break room in her purse to take home. One spends an hour in stall #3 of the bathroom each morning to avoid work. One spends 65% of her day checking in on her online dating profiles - Jeff, a promising paralegal, just asked her to dinner at Olive Garden this Friday night.
Kate runs a thriving charity benefiting the homeless and somehow has time to be a doting mother to four children. And has her yoga certification. And no chin hairs....
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.