Meet Elizabeth. She has a giant Goldendoodle, Charles, whose exuberance for life can be endearing for some, but downright dangerous for others. Upon greeting newcomers to her home, Charles immediately jumps up to lick their faces - sometimes springing up into the air and crashing into their nose. Elizabeth is horrified by this each and every time it happens, yet does nothing to effectively prevent it. She has never even attempted formal training. She apologizes profusely, as they insist that it's not a problem, they love dogs, and search for a tissue to wipe the blood from their nose. Charles continues to repeatedly jump up on the visitors as Elizabeth shouts at him to stop jumping. She's been doing this for two years and has yet to see success, but continues along this path in hopes that at least the visitors will see that she knows this is unacceptable. Eventually Charles starts in on exploring their crotch, which is a trickier situation. Elizabeth doesn't want to further embarrass the guest by calling attention to this behavior so she pretends like she doesn't see it happening. They do an awkward knee block and try to concentrate on what they were just saying, also pretending it's not happening, as they search for a pregnancy test. It's a very WASPY exchange. Eventually Charles wanders off to explore another visitor - preferrably a small child so that he can jump on them, knocking them over and thus making them easier to lick. Oh, Charles.
She goes into the pool restroom barefoot. She worked a stint in the infant room at a daycare center and was completely unphased by the diaper changing and poop getting on her fingers. Bodily fluids do not bother Judes, regardless of whether they come from human or animal.
Now that she's in her thirties, and still single, she finds it a bit harder to endure her romantic ideals but she will not give up hope! Surely there is a gorgeous man out there who loves to talk about his feelings, monogamy, loves to buy little presents for no reason, would totally get her sense of humor,
Valerie and Ivy have been best friends since high school. If one of them needed a kidney, the other would donate it. If one of them were in a burning building, the other would run back in to save her. They love each other fiercely, but they fight ALL. THE. TIME.
