Meet Jana. She’s about to kill her husband. Not the way you and I are in this quarantine, but I mean an actual life insurance, fake-an-accident kind of way. So listen to this: Jana met Brad at a low country boil hosted by a mutual friend (an attorney who would eventually become “their” attorney). He was wearing a pastel-color button-down, casually rolled-up sleeves and top two buttons unbuttoned. Jana looked lovely and fresh in her sundress and young boobs. Brad was tanned, young, confident, and a total prick. But he was very nice to her, so his prickish behavior towards others almost felt powerful to Jana. He was and still is a property developer and was riding a wave of success that would eventually make him one of the wealthiest and most influential people in their city. They married in a huge, elaborate, society pages type of wedding but their fairytale marriage darkened quickly. Brad could not, would not stay faithful. He slowly began to become dismissive of her, ridiculing her observations and opinions, belittling her consistently, and ignoring her the rest of the time. Jana’s anger and resentment have built and built over the years, but two weeks ago she caught him sexting with the 25-year-old nanny and she snapped. This had to be the 15th affair, and that’s of the ones she knew about. His infidelity had become a very open secret among their extended circle. Humiliating. Knowing that a divorce would leave her in a bad financial position and blacklisted from most local society and that Brad would retain their top-notch attorney from that fated oyster roast long ago, Jana has decided that an “accident” is the best option. She has planned and fretted, cried, and seethed. And tomorrow night, they will take a sunset cruise on their power yacht, where she will serve him his favorite dry martini, containing a little something extra, after which he may slip and fall overboard...and leave her to start anew with Manuel (Manuel???!!) Stay tuned... Eeek exciting! Will she do it?? Can she follow through?? Who is Manuel?? WHAT WILL SHE WEAR??!
Tiff and Ham host various hunts each year at their country home, so they have five bird dogs used primarily for these occasions. Tiff makes a big show of adoring these dogs but secretly she hates them because they’re always sniffing her crotch while she tries to make pleasantries with their guests. What most people don’t know about Tiffany is that her birth name is Kiki Byrd and she is actually from a small town in W. Virginia where she worked as a cashier at Dairy Queen for several years...
Meet Mary. She’s had many odd hobbies over the years. There was the time that she spent four months enthusiastically geocaching with an online group. Or the time she tried to put together a Quiddich team after watching Harry Potter. Mary has tried soap carving and beekeeping, but her latest hobby has really raised some eyebrows. She recently took up taxidermy.
Kate runs a thriving charity benefiting the homeless and somehow has time to be a doting mother to four children. And has her yoga certification. And no chin hairs....