This is Jody. Jody has reached her mid-thirties where she blessedly has realized how stupid it is to drive drunk, so Jody pretty much only hangs out with people in her neighborhood now, because mama ain't giving up that Pinot Grigio with dinner, and after dinner, and a little before dinner... This means she spends most of her time with a bipolar publicist, an intellectual property lawyer who constantly one-ups everybody, and a CPA with a drinking problem. But they are always down so they're in. Jody ventures out to Italian at Napoli right outside of her neighborhood each Tuesday night with the girls where she caaaaan't get enough breadsticks - she's such a breadaholic but we all amiright???? Jody has a vague feeling that she hit on Barb's husband, Stan, from three doors down at the cookie exchange last December but she can't be sure. His face turns red every time she passes him walking the dog, and she has this fuzzy memory of telling him she'd like to take him in the laundry room and find out what a urologist REALLY does. Stan is over 6 feet tall and still has most of his hair, so... Jody's favorite song is "red, Red Wine" by UB40.
Kate runs a thriving charity benefiting the homeless and somehow has time to be a doting mother to four children. And has her yoga certification. And no chin hairs....
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.