Meet Mimi. She’s an ex-pat currently living in France. She was a French major in college, which seemed like it would be a worthless degree until she met Jacques, a French poet in the US on a fellowship at Stanford. His sense of humor wasn’t the best but he was INTENSE and was the first man to ever make her...you know...in the bedroom. He implored her to move back home with him to Marseilles and she did. They lived together for a tumultuous month and a half (picture baguettes and handfuls of field flowers flung across the room in a rage) before she’d had enough and moved out, renting a garden apartment in the city center. She began waitressing and honed her French as well as her wine knowledge. That’s where she met Louis, one of the most notorious sommeliers in all of France. There were so many fantastic weekends in different French cities. SO. MUCH. WINE. It’s all a blur and during that time she did make her debut in a French independent film that required nudity and also animal masks but she was drunk most of those 8 months so the details really are hazy. As that fizzled out she met Henri, a wealthy financier who was 30 years her senior. Henri has a wonderful sense of humor, and all the passion of Jacques - even more connections than Louis, but he was developing liver spots and skin tags by now and had a horrid mole on his left ass cheek. But she could see past all that $omehow. He seemed to adore her and life with him was so ea$y. They married and lived in a lovely rambling estate in Provence. She indulged in rich food, rich wine, many friends, lots of books, and extensive European travel. He’s getting up there now, and she stands to inherit millions. Her favorite song is “If I Had a Million Dollars” by Barenaked Ladies...
Meet Elizabeth. She has a giant Goldendoodle, Charles, whose exuberance for life can be endearing for some, but downright dangerous for others. Upon greeting newcomers to her home, Charles immediately jumps up to lick their faces - sometimes springing up into the air and crashing into their nose.
She goes into the pool restroom barefoot. She worked a stint in the infant room at a daycare center and was completely unphased by the diaper changing and poop getting on her fingers. Bodily fluids do not bother Judes, regardless of whether they come from human or animal.
Now that she's in her thirties, and still single, she finds it a bit harder to endure her romantic ideals but she will not give up hope! Surely there is a gorgeous man out there who loves to talk about his feelings, monogamy, loves to buy little presents for no reason, would totally get her sense of humor,
