Meet Patricia. She’s the one with salsa dripping down her chin from the nachos she just made as her morning snack. The quarantine has really done a number on her self control. Yesterday she had 4 pieces of buttered toast for breakfast. Since she is homeschooling she did a morning snack for the kids, at which point she grabbed an apple for herself out of guilt about the toast. She got hungry again at 1:00 and ate the leftover pizza from the kids’ lunch - but just 2 pieces (that’s not so bad, right??). She was ravenous at 3:00 and all she could think about was the family size box of Cheezits in the pantry which they don’t normally have. She told herself she’d just have one handful and then had 3 because they are crack. For dinner, she was going to do grilled chicken or something but then her husband suggested they support their local Mexican restaurant (what kind of monster doesn’t support local restaurants at a time like this???) so she had cheese dip and enchiladas, takeout. Since she’s been sleeping in, she stayed up late watching a documentary that night, alone, and couldn’t resist the siren song of quick homemade nachos at 11 pm- 3 bags of chips in the pantry and tons of cheese and salsa in the fridge, plus fresh guacamole cannot be resisted. Then she went to bed full of self-loathing, noticing that her underwear felt tight. Tomorrow she’d do better but here she is, more nachos and it’s not even 11:00. Okay, she promises she’ll eat nothing but fruits and vegetables the rest of the day...
Kate runs a thriving charity benefiting the homeless and somehow has time to be a doting mother to four children. And has her yoga certification. And no chin hairs....
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.
