This is Stacy and she is so very much fun. She's the lift of the party and queen of karaoke ((usually "I Want to Dance with Somebody"). She's the last one awake, the last one to leave and she always gets handsy at the end of a big night. But Stacy is extremely forgetful. She hasn't been to the dentist in 3 years because she had to leave a message canceling her last appointment, and never remembered to call back and reschedule. She once sent her daughter to school in her nightgown thinking in was PJ day, but she had forgotten that it was the following week. She'll need to help with the therapy bills in a few years. Ever self-unaware, however, Stacy refers to herself as OCD even though she's a total shit show. She always wants her kitchen counters cleared off, but she has 18 old, stale French fries strewn throughout her car. She organizes her linen closet once a year but she owes the library $150 in lost books. She irons the collars of her button down shirts but there is a yogurt container in the back of her fridge that holds a previously undiscovered mold species that may honestly be the cure for cancer. Stacy is trying, and she's adorable and fun so we'll smile and nod forever if she wants us to.
This is the new Amy. This Amy would never have a gross refrigerator. She's not that kind of person. She's clean, organized and fresh. She feels sorry for the people with dirty fridge shelves and expired chicken stock boxes. She can't imagine having a 2 year old jar of pepperoncini peppers with mold on the inside of the lid. That's no way to live and Amy is glad she's the right kind of person. Yesterday Amy had two bags of clothes designated for Goodwill in her dining room corner. They'd been there for 2.5 months, eventually becoming invisible.
She slithers her way in and out of friend groups, wreaking havoc anywhere she can. She told you last week how much she admires you for not caring what you look like – she “just doesn’t feel right about leaving the house“ if she’s not completely put together.