Meet Tracy. Recently she happened upon a reel on Instagram about a fostered stray scat with a large cancerous mass on its chin. It looked a lot like that kid from the movie Mask, and Tracy is a cat person so she was transfixed by the horror of the cat’s condition, and the natural draw to a defenseless animal. Thus, she lingered over the video for 15 seconds, and that’s when her life dramatically changed. Every time she goes onto her social media, she is bombarded with animals besieged by various malformations and afflictions. Farms in South America full of hundreds of dogs in wheelchairs. Cats with oral cancer. Cat’s with one eye. Cats with no eyes. Dogs with deformed faces that look like Picasso paintings. A pet racoon subculture. Deer with maimed legs from traps. Rabbits with one testacle. Ducks with crooked beaks. Otters without bladders. Foster cats that have been brought from the brink of despair. Squirrels that drink milk out of teacups. It’s madness and she doesn’t know where it begins and where it ends. She fears even the slightest pause in her scroll will only strengthen the cursed algorithm. She has an ever-present pit in her stomach throughout the day, and she is on the verge of draining her savings account to donate to the ASPCA.
Tiff and Ham host various hunts each year at their country home, so they have five bird dogs used primarily for these occasions. Tiff makes a big show of adoring these dogs but secretly she hates them because they’re always sniffing her crotch while she tries to make pleasantries with their guests. What most people don’t know about Tiffany is that her birth name is Kiki Byrd and she is actually from a small town in W. Virginia where she worked as a cashier at Dairy Queen for several years...
Meet Mary. She’s had many odd hobbies over the years. There was the time that she spent four months enthusiastically geocaching with an online group. Or the time she tried to put together a Quiddich team after watching Harry Potter. Mary has tried soap carving and beekeeping, but her latest hobby has really raised some eyebrows. She recently took up taxidermy.
Kate runs a thriving charity benefiting the homeless and somehow has time to be a doting mother to four children. And has her yoga certification. And no chin hairs....